Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Psalm 37:4
I love this verse, and yet it bothers me. Delight myself in the Lord and whatever this little heart desires shall be mine? Really Lord? Because my heart desires some pretty rotten things. Didn’t You say my heart was deceitful in Jeremiah 17:9? So You really want to give it what it desires? And what about all those people who desire good things, but their prayers seem unanswered? Where is the the fulfillment of their desires? Why do some go fulfilled while some seem abandoned and alone?
I think of the mom who longs to be healed of cancer, but never is. The little girl who wants her mommy to be healed, but she must say goodbye anyways. The mom who watches her child struggle. Or the one who just can’t seem to stop hurting. Surely if any desire should be fulfilled, isn’t it these Lord?
He reminds me of one thing. One true and perfect promise. That all was, and is fulfilled on the cross. And yet tell that to the widow, or the bewildered momma…it almost seems cold.
Cold until we look at the heart of our desires.
At the heart of my desire to see a child relieved of suffering, is the need to know God loves them and sees them. That He protects them and knows what’s best for them. And indeed, amidst suffering in its worst form, I know my God is faithful. My desire has been fulfilled.
At the heart of my sweet sister in Christ, longing for the pain to stop, she just wants to know she is loved. Or perhaps that her loved ones are cared for. And yet His promises assure her that they are. Desire fulfilled and overflows.
And the sweet daddy who can’t stand to see another day with His wife scrawling in pain, he just needs to know it will end. And in Him there is no more pain. The desire stands fulfilled.
Even when the desire of our heart seems ignored, He sees the heart of our desires. To be loved. To be known. To be relieved, and see others relieved of suffering. He sees, He knows, and He summoned His only Son forth from the grave – that we may always receive what is at the heart of our desires.