If anyone was just going to have a single bout of depression, it would be me. I was sure of it. God delivered me never to go back again, right?
I’m realizing this wasn’t totally realistic thinking. Not that God couldn’t do this, because he could. But I have to acknowledge this side of heaven I still live in this body that at times is going to get a little seratonin starved. I have come to accept that this is okay. I don’t have to be afraid.
Sounds weird but I am so honestly thankful for this most recent wrestle with sadness. It couldn’t have come at a better time. I’m working on a book with a few friends for teens struggling with depression and the perpective I am getting is priceless. So here is my conclusion – this battle is a priceless gift.
What Satan meant for harm, God is using for good – for reals ya’ll! I know not everyone has the gift of positive surroundings like I do. I’m surrounded by Jesus loving friends and family who are holding me far above the pit I sank in previously. I don’t have to worry about sinking because even if I do God’s hand is never ever going to let go – I know this now. And because I know this my heart is on a fire mission to let others fighting with depression know that depression is not a death sentence. Rather it’s a life sentence to live a life constantly seeking the positive and running after the Glory of God. Only the hungry have the desire to eat and this battle with sadness and anxiety has given me a ravenous desire for His Word. My depraved body is in laying down a foundation of Biblical truth like it’s never eaten before. I stand in awe of this gift!
Depression does not happen because we don’t love God enough or anything silly like that. It rises out of a broken earthly depraved body with real life struggles and a brain needing more seratonin. So we must address this physical issue with medication and counseling. However, these things though essential, are missing one element. Freedom. When we add in God and studying His Word we find freedom in the midst of it all. Get what I’m saying? If you are depressed – care for yourself. Get the right medications and counseling – but get with Jesus! He’s the one who’s going to make the lemons into lemonade. He’s the miracle worker. The one who brings the good.
Be it depression, anxiety, addiction, or anything really – I wonder what would happen if we stopped fearing the onslaught and instead rather embraced what God is teaching us through these struggles. If we used every single smidgen of the pain for God’s glory. I think we would blow others out of the water with Jesus’ awesome rightousness and faithfulness. The world would see that even in this – God is love. Perfect unending love surrounded by the faithfulness of promises that never ever let go. So let’s embrace our life sentence – whatever it may be – the one we never really wanted to have, but the sentence that demands us live a life forever loving and dependent on the beautiful grace and love of Christ Jesus.