Sad-sitter…

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In my job I do a lot of home visits. Often I am asked to sit down, but I usually decline the offer. My work keeps me so busy there is rarely time to sit and stay a while, even though sometimes I would like to.

That’s why Psalm 107:10 struck me so deeply.

“Some sat in darkness and deepest gloom, imprisoned in iron chains of misery.”

As one who tends towards depression I certainly identify with the dark and gloom, but actually sitting in it disturbed me.

I began to wonder how many times sadness had invited me in and I chose to agree, sit down for a proverbial cup of tea, and stay a while? Were there times I actually chose this sad and gloomy environment as a place to sit?

As I went on in the text, conviction set in.

“They rebelled against the the words of God, scorning the counsel of the Most High.” Psalm 107:11

Ouch. Double ouch.

There I was, sitting in gloomy sadness, directly as a result of choosing to rebel against the Word of God.

And not in the ways I might traditionally think of rebellion. These traditional thoughts would have seen rebellion as lying, falling into old sin habits, maybe not spending enough quiet time in His Word….etc. But in fact, I was spending time in His Word, I just spent more time and effort refusing to believe that His Word is true.

God cares about me? He loves me? He hears my prayers? I read these things. I read His encouraging Word, but in my heart the uproarious rebellion raged on.

His Word can’t be true…He can’t love you…you are a failure.

And on and on I let my mind rant and rave, rebelling against His Word, all the while cozying in a bit deeper in that pit of gloom and sadness – imprisoning myself with mental iron chains.

Some sat in the darkness and gloom for sure…and I was certainly some of the sitting. Maybe you are too. So how do we get up?

Psalm 107:12-13 says, “So he subjected them to bitter labor; they stumbled, and there was no one to help.Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and he saved them from their distress.”

The bad news is, sometimes He has to allow some pretty rough stuff before we will cry out to Him. We have to get uncomfortable enough to want to and need to leave.

The good news is, when we finally cry out, He rescues.

Psalm 107:14 says, “He brought them out of darkness, the utter darkness, and broke away their chains.”

The chains of unbelief, of rebellion against the truth of His Word, can be broken. But they will be broken by His power, not yours.

The one certain way off the gloom couch is to cry out to Him, confess your thought rebellion, ask without ceasing for help overcoming you unbelief, surrender to His truth, and allow yourself to be saved by the Only One who can set you free. Maybe it’s time for us all to find a better place to sit.

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Comments

  1. says

    Ohhh Stephanie……. This resonates! Thank you. I’ve been feeling in a bit of a funk, off and on…. This is a time of transition in our family. My youngest is getting married and might be moving far away. Stuff like that! Exciting, but if I sit too long, I can get melancholy…… Anyway, thank you for sharing your wisdom. Love you, Girl!

  2. Carrie says

    Thanks for sharing this- your last 2 posts have definitely spoke to me. I too have been struggling with bits of sadness & irritation. The developing truth that continues to be given to me is Gods promise to always be there and He is the one and only to fill us! My husband & I both work in very emotionally demanding jobs- often times I look to him to fill me back up- and even though he’s a good man & loving husband many times I feel like it’s not enough- the truth is my ultimate filling & lifting of my head must come from God & no one else. This is a constant battle for me. Staying in the word is a must & my ultimate head lifter & cup filler. Your blog, P31 ministries, & my you version devotions keep me grounded where I need to be- thank you! In closing I want to share psalms 3:3 which also spoke to me today & definitely relates-
    But you, Lord, are a shield around me, my glory, the One who lifts my head high. (Psalm 3:3 NIV)

  3. says

    Stephanie, I agree with much of what you have said. We are responsible for our choices and how and if we turn to God in our sad state. But how do you correlate this with clinical depression – which often if not always – does not improve even when the person with the illness does all that they are ‘supposed’ to be doing and are not in rebellion against God or His Word?

    • says

      Clinical depression is different and oh have I been there myself. In that case, counseling and medication are often necessary and helpful. Once the issues have been addressed and the medication and health issues behind depression can be lined out by a professional – then comes in this blog post. Often we aren’t in so to speak rebellion traditionally against His Word but our minds rebel against the truth of His Word – that we are loved and accepted. Our cognitions have to reform themselves around His truth and that takes time and lots and lots of work (sometime involving cognitive behavioral counseling) especially if the messages from our past oppose our value and worth in Him…

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  4. kellysshining says

    Stephanie, I just loved your post. Last week I felt like I was completely wrapped up in depression. The moment I got up, I slipped and fell back into it. Thank you for this post. What a blessing your words were to me. 🙂

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